Wednesday, February 15, 2012

3dLessons4Life

A found a new blog to follow.
3dlessons4life's blog

A real person who shares her heart and struggles in this life.

A fellow disciple who struggles with following an obedient life every day - just.like.me! How eucahristeo-ly thankful I am for the One who continues to uphold my beauty even in my ugliness!

A wife and mother who wonders if she'll ever "measure up", but finds grace in His word that we won't, and it doesn't matter - we aren't supposed to.

A woman assigned to her value in Christ.

Take some time to see for yourself.

In Christ ALONE!~
e

A long time away...

Why do I abandon what is good? Why is it so easy to walk away from some things? Like this blog.... it is a good place to record thoughts, events and people. It's a great source of communication to my family and friends.... if they care to read it.

I just read something that reminded of my blog. My last post was April 20, 2011, a very eventful and painful time in my life. And I guess that's what led to my "walking away" from my blog. It became a thing of the past, because I can't recall the last time I remembered this space. This makes me sad, and now I want to become more diligent in taking up this task again. But will I?

Life is busy. There are so many forms through which to communicate. I can only promise to myself to be more intent upon returning here once or twice a week; to form a new habit; to not stay away so long.

Time will only tell.

Elizabeth

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

It's difficult to rejoice.

She's gone from this Earth. Aunt Daisy passed away last night at 10:35 p.m. central time. Death creeped into the dark of night and took her home to Jesus. I imagine, too, that she was then delivered into the arms of her awaiting mother, other family and friends. That's not so bad when you think about it. Actually, that's the best place to be - rejoicing in the healing properties of heaven. However, it's a difficult place for me right now.

As a Christian, Daisy had the assurance of heaven; so do I. I am rejoicing over her entrance onto the streets paved with gold. I have thought of nothing else about her death except of what she must be experiencing right now. How upon the first hour she was taking it all in. Then it was the second hour - who had she seen? At the same time these thoughts were going on, I was communicating with family back at the house as to the realities of what comes after the death of an individual, especially when that individual has passed away in her own home. There were painful tasks that had to be completed. It's difficult to accomplish such tasks when there is much shock and sorrow entering into the equation. Meanwhile, back in heaven there is much rejoicing and praising going on. What a contrast of emotions!

I've lost not only my aunt, but a friend. Since I was a child, I remember always connecting with her. And as I grew into an adult, we established a close relationship. There are so many memories, but the ones that happened most frequently were the phone calls.

From my childhood, I remember my mother calling her sister (and subsequent family) on Saturdays. The dialing rates were cheaper, so every Saturday she spoke with Aunt Daisy. This is a deeply rooted memory. As I grew up, I started doing the same thing. It's what I knew. Fortunately for us all, the rates adjusted, and you could call after 9pm any night of the week, so the calls became more frequent. Eventually, as is the case now, it doesn't matter when you call. The rates are all the same. Therefore, my relationship with Aunt Daisy was then deeply rooted in many frequent phone calls as well. I am now shaking my head at the thought of never being able to hear that voice over the phone. I can't call her during an Alabama football game. I won't be able to call her to share the successes (or failures) of my children. I no longer can call just to see how she is. Well, now I have to imagine how she is, but that's difficult to do through my tears. It's difficult to rejoice at her healing right now.

So we're now into 12 hours after death. There's still rejoicing going on in heaven. I sit here alone in my sorrowful thoughts imagining what's going on in her Minnesota home and in her heavenly home. That's just it: I can only imagine. But one thing's for sure, one day I will know, and that's the best assurance I can have. Meanwhile, I experience conflicting emotions of sadness and sorrow versus gladness and exultation. It's just plain difficult, and I don't like it.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Free at Last

I can't help but think "free at last" while I sit in some peace and quiet at home. Caroline is in the Dominican Republic on a mission trip this week, and Joel and Reid have just left for an undetermined amount of time to work at the marina. Therefore, the freedom I am experiencing at the current time is much appreciated and deserved, I think! There used to be times when I would have the house to myself. In thinking back on that, my mind take me to the time when Caroline was 1 month old, and Mom drove to Decatur to pick up Caroline for Mom's Spring Break! And I let her go! 1 month old, I tell you! I remember that moment they pulled out of the driveway just like it was yesterday. After getting used to the idea that I just let my newborn daughter leave for a week, surely I was thinking "free at last" then, too. Mom would often do that for her Spring Break, even after Reid came along. What a gift she was giving me! Lately, though, I can't recall the last time I have had the house to myself. Joel has been gone, or now having just returned, so I know there hasn't been a time in the last 2 years. However, now that I am enjoying this moment, I recall what I have been missing. It is truly wonderful, and my mind is racing through all the things I can accomplish during this time. There's tv shows to watch on the DVR; there's a scrapbook room that's feeling lonely and empty; there are friends (a few who are left behind) to see; and there's work to be done on the coffee I'm catering in a week. So much.... little time, really. Whatever I choose, I know I will enjoy just being "free at last".

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Letting Go

It's not easy letting go of a prized possession. Just hearing that connotation makes me want to clamp down on it more tightly. It would be important to me, something I want to keep. Time has been invested, love has been given, and depending on what that item is, love could have been taken from it as well. In this case, this "item" is my aunt, Daisy.

She has been a treasured member of our family. She has loved me like her child since birth. She has loved my husband as a "son-in-law". She has loved my children as her own grandchildren. And by loving, I mean she has devoted herself to whatever we needed from her and more, and she has delivered, just as a mother would for her children.

She's also been a friend to me. We've shared so many conversations over the years, and as an adult, I have appreciated the relationship we have developed. We could talk about familial relations or an Alabama football game and share the deepest of emotions on both accounts! Some of my favorite moments on the phone with her have been during a nail-biting Bama football game. She can get so nervous and excited over the simplest of plays... just like her mother! No one can ever duplicate her nervousness or jittery screams!

Well, as I have learned over the past couple of days, I am having to let go of this "prized possession". Cancer is taking another victim. Crap! (That's not really the four-letter word I want to use here. I can think of many others!) It's not pretty, and in a couple of days, I will be seeing it for myself. I will be letting it go in person.
And God has affirmed this morning that it's okay. I open my devotional book (Jesus Calling) to today's devotion, and here it is. As more often than not, it is a timely devotion.

"This is a time in your life when you must learn to let go; of loved ones, of possessions, of control. In order to let go of something that is precious to you, you need to rest in My Presence, where you are complete. Take time to bask in the Light of My Love. As you relax more and more, your grasping hand gradually opens up, releasing your prized possession into My care.

You can feel secure, even in the midst of cataclysmic changes, through awareness of My continual Presence. The One who never leaves you is the same One who never changes: I am the same yesterday, today, and forever. As you release more and more things into My care, remember that I never let go of your hand. Herein lies your security, which no one and no circumstance can take from you."

Amazing, really. He does listen and address the desires and concerns of our hearts, and all He desires is for us to rest in Him. I do, for during circumstances through which I am living right now, that's all I can do, for He can provide the hope I need to get through it. And then one day, soon enough, I will be reunited with my "prized possession". And in conclusion, I am not really having to let go for long.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Is anybody out there?

Since restarting this adventure in blogging, I am curious to know if this is just a cathartic journey for me alone, or is someone joining me as I type out my thoughts on a random basis. Who else is here?

Whatever the case, I do enjoying typing out my thoughts, even though someone else might find them mundane. It is indeed a cathartic journey, as I find that in typing them and subsequently "publishing" them, I release thoughts into the world wide web (www) where they get tangled up in mess of verbage "out there".

One could also call this a journal. Will it forever remain "out there" for my grandchildren and beyond to see? Or at some point will I have to save as another random file on my computer and/or print to publish a notebook of these thoughts? (Think about that..... how much information can this www hold? Limitless?) In thinking that my grandchildren, or heck, even my children can go back 10 years from now and read what I have posted today, I then realize that I am creating a journal of history. What a testament of my life/their lives/our lives as a family!

So I guess these thoughts aren't so random after all. Well, they are, but in the thoughts are feelings and events that touched my life. It's more of a record than can be found in the photos I have taken. While "they" say that a photo speaks 1,000 words, or something like that, I can speak 1,000 words and beyond, and I can tell a story. It may not be that fabulous of a story, however, if the words are blended with photos, then one heck of a story is being told.

I think I'll continue to type out these thoughts, for I look back at all I've left out in 1 year of absence from blogging, and I'm sad that those events aren't recorded. So much happened in the last year, the biggest impact having been Joel's deployment to Iraq. We made it through that event, but so many emotions occurred that could have been easily recorded on this blog. But we can't look back, only forward. And, it starts with today, for God says, "...do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34 So, I do start with today, because indeed, it does have enough "trouble" that I must turn over to Him, for only He can handle the burden.

Monday, March 21, 2011

It's Monday morning.... again!

Monday morning. What does it mean to you?

As I sit here this morning at 9:30 a.m., I look at the days/week ahead, and I ponder what I will do with them/it. Then it all becomes overwhelming to me, as there is so much I'd like to accomplish, then I want to shut down. It's too much! So where do I begin?

This is the time that I would turn to facebook and get lost within it. I would look to other statuses to see how my friend's are getting through this morning and what they will do with their week. From what I would gather, I would then make adjustments to my day/week. However, without that input today, I must motivate myself to "git 'r done". So here I go.

On the other hand, don't expect to hear a whirlwind of activity coming from North Georgia. I don't feel any rumblings.

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